Who do you listen to?

I often read books, listen to Cd's and attend seminars on: investing, personal development and professional development. I am always surprised when that when I tell people this I usually get 1 of 2 reactions.

Reaction #1

"Aren't those for rich people. Why would you read a book on investing if you don't have lots of money to invest?"

Reaction #2

" What a waste of time! If you want some financial advice, I'll give you some for free."

When I hear either one of these reactions I smile and respond one of the following ways:

Response #1

"How do you think all of those wealthy got to be wealthy? Luck?"

Response #2

"I would love to hear your advice, how much investment income have you earned and what is your net worth?"

You see the only people I take financial advice from, are the people who have achieved financial success. When I think about "financial success" these are the 5 things I look for:

1. Positive Net worth
2. Debt Free
3. 50% Annual income + in savings
4. Investing that has yielded 10%-12% returns over the long run.
5. Reinvestment of investment income

You see when it comes to handling my money I only want to listen to people who have displayed a strong understanding and discipline with their own finances. Don't let a Friend or family member sway you from seeking wise financial council. These people may have some "good" ideas but if you don't see financial fruits in their life, don't put a lot of stock in their advice. Even financial planners often lack the personal experience in their own investing and financial discipline to offer sound advice. Always seek out the people who have the knowledge and experience to help you, don't listen to anyone else. They will either approach their advice from a negative point of view or give you bad advice resulting from lack of experience. So attend the seminars and read the books. It is better to learn infomation and skills before you need them, than it is to back track after you should have learned them.

Negativity and Christmas

Both optimists and pessimists contribute to our society. The optimist invents the airplane and the pessimist the parachute.- (Gil Stern)

First things first, Merry Christmas! As we enter the Christmas season many people focus on the negatives. They focus on the stress of: shopping, cooking, wrapping, traveling....etc. What a missed opportunity! These are the same people who miss the everyday joys of life! Don't fall into the Christmas negativity trap! Christmas should focus on three things:

1) The blessing of Christ Jesus' birth: Christ came to earth to spare us from an eternity separated from God. Not only does Christ sacrifice provide us with a fulfilling eternity but it also provides us with a more fulfilled life here on earth. If you look at life through the lens of "redemption through Christ" you find that there is much less to be negative about!

2) The blessing of Friends and family: This is a time to spend with Friends and family. Not because you "have to" but because you "want to." Christmas is an opportunity to bless your family with a great meal, a gift or a kind gesture. How often do you take time to show your appreciation for your Friends? How often to you tell your loved ones how much they mean to you? If it has been a while, Christmas is the time to remind them. Make this your focus and you will find very little to be negative about.

3) Being a blessing to those in need: Christ came to a world in need of a savior. He sacrificially gave his life for our eternal freedom. We should echo the act of giving to a world in need. Christmas is a time bless those in need. Whether you give a present, a check or your time: giving is a sure fire way to put some Christmas cheer in your heart. By focusing on the less fortunate we will find there is much less to be negative about.


As we approach Christmas remember the eternal gift of salvation. Remember the blessing of Friends and family. Remember to give to those in need. This is the essence of Christmas. If you embrace these 3 areas you will find yourself in more positive frame of mind this season.

Merry Christmas,

-David

Expectations without action

Life's under no obligation to give us what we expect. - (Margaret Mitchell)

When it comes to our expectations of life, there are two kinds of people "those who want" and "those who do." Those who do, decide what they want in life and then change their expectations and actions to achieve it. Those who want, decide what they want in life and then change their expectations but not their actions. Those who just expect to make more money but don't work for it, fall into this second category. Those who invest in themselves and put in the hard work to achieve it fall into the first category. I see so many people who expect for everything in life to be taken care of. They say things like:

I expect the government to help me.
I expect my family to support me.
I expect my boss to give me a raise.

Unfortunately, life (i.e. the government, family or your boss) has no obligation to give you what you expect. If you expect a better life but your actions do not support your expectations, then you will never achieve what you expect. It is only when your beliefs and expectations match your actions that you will achieve the level of success you "expect" in life. So STOP expecting and START acting!

Do I need a mentor?

Do I need a mentor? If you have never asked yourself that question, than you could be missing out on a GREAT opportunity to improve both personally and professionally! A mentor by definition is someone who serves as a wise and trusted advisor. A mentor is someone who challenges you and is capable of providing wise council for you in particular areas of life. Some of the most successful people in history have relied on the guidance of mentors. All presidents seek the advice of trusted advisors in their cabinet. Generals gather together several experts in their respective fields when drawing up battle plans. Multi-millionaires often rely on the input of consultants, mentors and experts. Everyone needs a mentor. In many cases more than one! Here are some guidelines to use when selecting a mentor:

1. Your mentor should never be your boss or an employee above or below at any level in your organizations structure.
2. Your mentor should never be a friend or close family member. You want someone who can provide a neutral perspective. Friends and family will often be biased. Also a mentor should be able to be completely open and honest. You can’t always get this from friends or family.
3. Your mentor should have a track record for success in the area you are looking to improve. Look for at least 5 years of successful application of the advice they want you to follow. If they don’t follow their own coaching than you should look elsewhere for advice.
4. Your mentor should have at least 1-3 hours per week or 4-12 hours per month available to meet with you. Having a mentor that never spends time with you (or uses your time together ineffectively) is waste of your time.
5. Your mentor may ask to be compensated for their time. This is okay so long as the value they are adding to your life is worth (this is a personal determination) the fee being charged. For instance it would be worth $100 a month for mentoring if it helped me earn a promotion and $15,000/yr salary increase within 12 months. Only pay for mentoring if it makes sense for you. Don’t go into debt seeking a financial advice!
6. Don’t be afraid to get more than one mentor if you feel it would be beneficial. It is generally a good idea to have a mentor in one or more of the following areas: fitness, finances, business, and relationships.
7. At some point you may out grow your mentor. This is not a sign that you don’t need one anymore. You just need a different one.

Wisdom is not the result of the knowing the solution to every problem. Wisdom is the ability to admit what you don’t know and then seek it out. If you are seeking wisdom in any area of your life, a mentor is a great place to seek a solution.

Pocketful of Time

Each of us is given a pocketful of time to spend however we may. We may use what we will. We waste what we will. But we can never get back a day. - (Roger Wilcox)

Today holds infinite possibility! Everyday we have 24 hours to spend. What we spend it on makes a huge difference on the level of success we achieve in life. When we realize that the Donald Trumps of the world, have those same 24 hours (they just spend them better) it should cause us to evaluate where our time goes. If you don't know, you can't change it. Today I would like you to:

1) Think about a famous wealthy person.
2) Map out how you think that person spends their 24 hours. How much time:
-Planning investments
-Tracking business financials
-Educating themselves
-Networking
-Relaxing
-Etc.
3) Map out a week in that persons life.
4)Map out an average 24 hours in your life. How much time is spent:
- Sleeping
- Spending time with family
- Working
- Watching TV
- Reading
- etc.
5) Map out your average week.
6) How does your use of time compare to that wealthy person you used?
7) What can you do in the next 30 days to maximize every 24 hour period?

Time management is critical to your success in life. Make today first day you maximize every hours and squeeze the life out of each minute.

Conflict

He who wrestles with us strengthens our nerves, and sharpens our skill. Our antagonist is our helper. - (Edmund Burke)

This is a great reminder that "conflict" is a driving force for change in our lives. Without conflict we tend to accept the status qua. Conflict causes us to change old behaviors and strive for new ones. Conflict is not always "fun" but it is necessary. Without conflict there is no character. Without character there is no growth. I think proverbs says it best:

"As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another." - (Proverbs 27:17)

If you do not have someone in your life who "sharpens" you, then you are missing out on the benefits of conflict. 2 great ways to find someone who will push you to the next level are as follows:

- Find a mentor: look for someone at work or in your personal life who embodies the type of person you want to be. Respectfully ask them if they would be interested in taking on a mentor. If they say YES, than you need to be prepared for them to tell you what you are doing wrong and what you need to change. Take this information with an open mind and heart. Apply it in your life and you will surprised at the results. (If you get a NO keep trying to find a mentor until you get a YES.)

- Think about the people in your life who are "brutally honest." Cultivate those relationships and surround yourself with those people. CAUTION: Do not surround yourself with destroyers (non-supportive envious folk) they will only bring your down and de-moralize you. You want honest people who have your best interests in mind. There is a big difference between the two. Never seek conflict at the expense of your self esteem, it is never worth it.

So today go out and find that honest Friend or mentor and begin to seek a source of conflict in your life, that will push toward the ideal you.

Quote for 12/4/2009

Imagination is more important than knowledge. - (Albert Einstein)


Knowledge will help you reach understanding of the problem but will often limit your ability to solve it. If you always try to solve a problem using what you "know" you will never be able to see beyond the limits of what is "reasonable." Most of the worlds great success achieved the results because they were unreasonable. A reasonable person says "that is just the way it is," an unreasonable say "I can change anything because I always have the power to change myself." Stop relying on what you "know." Start thinking about "what could be" and find a pathway to achieve it. "But David you don't understand, I am horrible with money! Every investment I have ever made has been a failure." WRONG! You are great at handling money, you just don't believe it! What you believe will compel you or hold you back. Many times believing is unreasonable but unreasonable creates results. The unreasonable person would say "even though my last 15 investments were not successes, I learned 15 ways not to invest! My next 15 will be much more profitable as a result!" Then to guarantee that success they would invest 20% of all their resources (time, money, etc.) to making that belief a reality. Surrounding themselves with books on investing, attending seminars and finding investors to provide them wise council.

Don't KNOW IT, BELIEVE IT even if it is unreasonable then create the pathway to achieve it!

A rose by any other name......

I have a favorite coffee shop that I visit on occasion. In honesty I am not a big fan of their coffee. The coffee shop doesn’t have any seating; instead the employees serve hundreds of customers a day through two drive-through windows. Sometimes when traveling for work I may go several weeks without stopping by. In that time they have undoubtedly seen thousands of customers! Yet, every time I come back they remember:

· My name

· My wife’s name

· The vehicles we own

· Our favorite drinks

· And several other details

It is for that reason and for that reason only that I continue to visit that coffee shop every chance I get!

It is no secret that people like to hear their own name. More importantly people like to talk about themselves. One of the keys to making a BIG first impression and maintaining your customer base is to listen and remember. This seems basic but it is remarkable how few businesses take the time to train their employee how to do it right! This is one of the many things that I train all of my employees and clients to do. They are all surprised by its effectiveness and simplicity. Just think about how you feel when someone forgets your name or fails to listen to what you’re saying. It is enough to drive anyone crazy! So how do you do it? Below are 10 easy to follow steps to increase your listening and memorization abilities.

· Listening

1. Mirror the individuals eye contact

2. Open body position. Avoid:

§ Crossed Arms (defensive or angry)

§ Hands on Hips (impatient)

§ Hands in Pockets (apathetic)

3. Nod your head to show that you agree/disagree

4. Ask clarifying questions

5. Summarize the key points

· Remembering Names

1. When you meet someone for the first time focus more on their name than anything else!

2. Make a name association (For example: Dr. Bush = bushy eye brows)

3. Use their name at least 3 times in the first few minutes.

4. Create a seating charts if necessary

5. If you forget their name be sincere, apologize and ask for it again.

Effective E-Mail Organization

Effective e-mail management is less about time and effort and more about strategy and consistency. So how do you do it? The first step in this process is to determine your organization styles. There are three main styles¹:

 

1.   Searchers: opt for minimal work up front on the grounds that they can use tools to find what they’re looking for later.

2.   Filers: believe that everything has a place and that it should be in that place so they can find it instantly.

3.   Taggers: are somewhere in between; they depend on search, but like to sprinkle hints around to make it easier for the search engine.

 

Once you know your style it becomes a lot easier to determine what will work for you and what won’t. For instance, searchers will never consistently utilize a rigid filing method. Use what works for you! The second step in effective e-mail management is learning the “4 D’s.” Before you ever consider how to file or where to move a mail item you need to consider the “4 D’s²:”

 

1.   Delete it

a.   Does the message relate to a meaningful objective you're currently working on? If not, you can probably delete it. Why hang on to information that doesn't relate to your main focus?

b.   Does the message contain information you can find elsewhere? If so, delete it.

c.   Does the message contain information that you will refer to within the next six months? If not, delete it.

d.   Does the message contain information that you're required to keep? If not, delete it.

2.   Do it

a.    If you can't DELETE IT, then decide, "What specific action do I need to take?" and "Can I DO IT in less than two minutes?" If you can, just DO IT.

3.   Delegate it

a.    If you can't DELETE IT or DO IT in two minutes or less, can you DELEGATE IT?

b.    If you can delegate it, do it right away. You should be able to compose and send the delegating message in about two minutes

 

4.   Defer it

a.    If you cannot DELETE IT, DO IT in less than two minutes, or DELEGATE IT you will need to defer it. Only defer it if the action required is something that only you can accomplish and it will take more than two minutes.

                                           i.    Also think about flagging these items for follow up.

 

So how big of a difference do the “4 D’s” make? Statistics show that if you use this method you will find that²:

 

·         50 percent can be deleted or filed

 

·         30 percent can be delegated or completed in less than 2 minutes

 

·         20 percent can be deferred to your Task List or Calendar to complete later

 

If you have to defer the e-mail and you are a filer consider one of these primary filing methods:

 

·         File by sender

o   Many people find that name associations are easier to remember than subjects.

o   You can file mail items by sender (i.e. Jay Meyer, Charlie Hamilton etc.)

·         File by subject

o   This can be a certain training course we offer

o   A market in your region

o   etc.

·         File by importance or length or response

o   Is this low, medium or high priority?

o   Is this a quick response or a lengthy response

 

By implementing these steps alone you will see a drastic increase in your e-mail productivity. If you combine them with the tips listed below you will be an e-mail super star!

 

·         Group similar messages together

·         Search folders instead of “All mail.”

·         Flag items for follow up

·         Schedule uninterrupted time everyday to process e-mail

·         File your sent items too!

·         Use rules when you can

·         Archive old items to make space

 

 

 

 

 

References:

 

1) http://webworkerdaily.com/2007/02/15/10-tips-for-organizing-your-e-mail/

2) http://www.microsoft.com/atwork/productivity/email.aspx

3) http://zenhabits.net/2007/11/obsessive-compulsives-guide-top-12-organizing-tips-plus-resources/

4) http://www.theistudio.com/muse/10-e-mail-organization-tips/

5) http://www.netmanners.com/email-etiquette/10-email-organization-tips/

 

7 Steps to Better Habits

Greetings!

Today I was reflecting on a seminar I spoke at several months ago. I was speaking to a group of 30 or so participants. The speech went smoothly and I had many people approach me afterward to discuss how they will apply what they learned and how they will change their behavior. As much as I like to hear those comments I can't help looking back on my experience. That experience teaches me that if 8 people out of those 30 actually apply the training (i.e. change fundamental behavior) that would be above average. I started thinking about the contrast between the participants "intent" and the "reality" that very few of them would really change anything at all. As I started to dwell on this fact, I noticed one of the participants in the back of the room straightening some chairs. It was a pleasant surprise! I immediately walked over to him and thanked him for his help in re-setting the room. As I started talking with the young man, I happened to ask him why he stuck around to help out. He reluctantly explained that he was trying to overcome a bad habit. Recently his wife had pointed out that he "always" leaves a mess when he leaves a room. So, to try and overcome that habit he has been straightening up every time he gets up to leave a room. I asked him how it was working? He went on to tell me that at first it wasn't easy for him. After all, there were several good habits he was trying to form. When I asked him how he was able to juggle so many "demands" or "challenges," he responded:

"Well, I have learned to only focus on one habit per day. I have 5 behaviors I am trying to change and I work on a new one each day. As soon as I reach the 5th one I start back over. Since there are 7 days a week, I am always practicing a new habit on a different day!"

It seemed pretty simple but very powerful. Within that one concept the participant was able to draw three important points about behavioral changes. The first point touched on prioritization. It is impossible to effective work on 5 different behaviors all of the time. By shifting the priority level of each behavior he was able to make great strides. Secondly, he was able to conclude that in order to change behavior he had to be consistent. Consistency is key when trying to drop or develop new habits. The last point that he touched on was re-evaluating the approach. Many people start out with a great plan, but unless you constantly re-evaluate the effectiveness of your plan, you will often veer way off course.

The participant then went on to explain how her would apply a similar approach to implementing the training. In fact, he had already begun to prioritize the new behaviors I had been trying to educate the class on. He had also scheduled a time to re-evaluate the implementation of his plan. Eventually, he left (after a considerable amount of cleaning up) I realized there was one final piece that warranted analysis. He only changed the behavior he was displaying after it had been communicated that is should change. This is key because so many managers fail to effectively provide coaching around behavior with their teams. But, if there is no communication there will be no change. If there is no change than the inefficiencies will continue. So if you really want to change your behavior or the behavior of another follow these steps:

1. Identify- the areas of concern
2. Prioritize- the level of importance
3. Plan- how to overcome
4. Execute- the plan
5. Re-evaluate the plan
6. Re-peat

3 Tip's to Better Public Speaking

For several years public speaking has reigned as the #1 fear for most Americans. So what is the big deal? Why do we fear something so common and so simple? Well the rational behind this fear may be surprisingly varied, there are three common fear that most people share:

1. Fear of humiliation: the fear that you will mess up or stumble and the audience will mock or chastise you.
2. Fear of transparency: the fear that the audience will see right through you and discredit you as result of any inadequacies. 
3. Fear of chaos: the fear that you will lose control over the audience.

Because this is such a common fear I wanted to share 3 simple tips to combat these underlying fears. While you may always feel a little uncomfortable speaking in public if you can follow these simple steps you will find public speaking will come much easier:

1. Whenever possible, be the first one there. It can be very intimidating to walk into a packed room; however, if you can be at the main entrance to greet your audience as they walk in you will feel more relaxed when you take the stage. Having the ability to personalize your audience and observe the room gradually filling up, will take away the shock-factor when you take the podium.  
2. Don't over prepare! If you over prepare you will become flustered in the occurrence of a slip up or variation. It is better to follow bullet points or main topics than it is try and read through an entire speech. Also, don't try to memorize large pieces of information. Stage fright has a tendency to cause "memory retrieval que errors," basically: you won't be able to access that memory when you need too.
3. Work in audience affirmation. When appropriate you will want to work in humor and audience feedback questions. If you can get the room to laugh at a joke or yell out an affirming "YES" to one of your questions, it will immediately boost your confidence.

If you can implement these suggestions into your next presentation, I guarantee you will feel more comfortable and relaxed. There is no reason why public speaking should be your number one fear. Put these steps into action, practice whenever possible and remember you control your success as a speaker not the audience!

Outside vs Inside

I want you to think about an average day in your life. Think through your routine, including: clothes, food, expenses, worries, habits, etc. More importantly I want you to think about how much of your day you spend worrying about the external factors in life. These factors often include: weather, clothes, food, work, the economy and more. We give control of our thoughts and emotions over to things we have no control of. We give control to things that are fleeting and minor when compared to life in its entirety. All these outside factors cost us money, time and peace. But how much do we spend on the inside? How much time do you spend making yourself better? How much effort do you put into preparing for changes instead of worrying about them? The best way to handle life’s challenges and set backs, is to prepare for them. I would challenge you to start embracing this attitude TODAY!

How do I start? I want you to find one thing in your life you want to change; for some people it could be physical appearance, for others it is time management. Whatever that one thing is for you, I want you to think about what prevents you from fixing it. And more importantly what you can do today to start down the path to self improvement. Start small if you have to but the key is to START! If you can’t think of anything try one of the three tips below to jump start your life!

1) Listen to self improvement audio-books on your way to and from work.
2) Spend 15 minutes each day creating, reviewing and executing personal goals.
3) Replace 20 minutes of inactivity (i.e., TV watching, reading, video games, surfing the web, etc.) with 20 minutes of walking, biking, swimming, playing basketball, etc.

And if you really want to kick off ’09 try all three!

This segment also featured in a recent issue of the www.migilla.com newsletter!